An End-of-Life (EOL) Doula, also known as a Death Doula, is a non-medical professional trained to care for the dying and their loved ones holistically (physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually). A Death Doula guides families and their dying loved ones before, during and after death.
A lot of people need support yet don't get to hospice. Death doulas fill that gap. We are an addition to the care team not a replacement and we are typically hired privately. Our skill sets vary but the main aspects remain the same: we are a companion. We advocate, educate and empower our clients.
Within this, we will cover an advanced care directive, vigil planning and funeral planning. I have also included a section about who you are and what you value. I recommend that anyone 18+ years of age, no matter the health status, contemplate what their wishes of care should be. Planning your end of life is an act of love for you and your loved ones. What does a good death look like to you? When you document your wishes of care and make copies to go to your health care team, substitute decision maker (SDM), and /or family and friends, this will greatly increase your chances of having your wishes to be carried out. You have the power to change your mind at any time. I suggest reviewing this plan every 1 to 5 years. Typically, this type of planning takes between 2-6 hours. This can be done in-person or remotely. Once completed, I will send a pdf file by email.
Animal death doula:
Losing a pet is very difficult and for some, even more so than losing a human companion. I offer compassionate, holistic, and informational support to animals/pets and their owner(s). When a furry loved one is facing chronic or terminal illness without a cure, the goal is to make the final days and weeks more comfortable. I will assist in creating a "pet hospice" within your home. I offer respite care and reiki. I will come with you to vet appointments and advocate for both the pet and owner. I will sit vigil, offer grief support and assist with post death arrangements.
Respite care is a time for the caregiver to carry out other tasks, activities and to tend to other areas of their lives. This time can be used to offer emotional support, being a companion, light housekeeping, etc. Also, this can be a great time to create legacy and life review projects and receive reiki/reflexology. (I would also like to include companion and bedside care under this category.)
Legacy & life review projects:
Legacy and life review projects can be made at any point in time and can consist of creating a journal full of memories, recipe books, writing letters to be opened on specific dates, etc. The list is endless! Reviewing one's life while nearing death is common and often, people consider what they would like to pass on or leave behind. These projects provide a sense of purpose and help one to process their life and what it means to them. It is important to note that it's ok if what is started is not finished. This can be done one-on-one or it could be a family/group project.
Active vigil sitting:
I offer on call and round the clock support for the person going through the active dying stage along with their loved ones. This is the time to advocate for the person's comfort care and create sacred space as they have wished. I highly recommend reiki during this stage. It helps move the energy through the person that allows for a more peaceful transition. This time can also include support for the family members following the passing of their loved one.
There are many funeral options these days such as; living funeral, home funeral, Traditional or celebration of life. Some people even want to create a hybrid, combining certain aspects of these options into one. Planning and carrying out a funeral service can be overwhelming for the family. I can take some stress out of a difficult time by making the arrangements. This also allows the family to be more present with their person.
Grief and post loss support:
The reality is that it can be difficult to navigate yourself through grief. I will hold a safe space for you to express whatever comes through. I also offer reiki/reflexology for grief support because it helps to release stuck energy (emotions are energy) within the body. We can discuss support groups, grounding techniques and create a self-care plan. No matter when this loss occurred or if you are currently experiencing anticipatory grief, please feel free to reach out if you need this support. I offer this service in-person or remotely.
Pregnancy and infant loss support:
Many couples do not receive proper support after they experience the loss of a baby. No matter the culture, education or upbringing, there is this perception that women especially should stay silent in their grief. I will step in to speak with family and friends to schedule meal plans and care plans for the other children if desired. We can discuss funeral or memorial services and help to create a ritual to honor the baby. I offer grief and holistic support. For example, herbs and essential oils to aid in healing the womb space. I will also assist with finding the right support group.
Care for the caregiver:
Self-care is so important for the caregiver(s) but many often feel guilty for taking the time for it or feel worried that something may happen while they've stepped away. I have designed care for the caregiver to focus solely on those that are currently in a caregiving role. I will help you to create a self-care plan tailored to suit your needs and offer emotional support. I also offer 1 hour reiki and reflexology sessions. These sessions can help ease anxiety, guilt, anger and grief.
Post death home organization & energy clearing:
Also known as organization and material artifact support. After the passing of a loved one, it can be overwhelming to determine what to do with a lifetime of personal belongings. There will be many valuable items but some that are mundane. I can help guide you through this process and if desired, memorialize items. I am able to create feng shui and restore peace by sweeping and cleansing the aura of a person, room and home. This should be done often like after sickness or arguments but is very helpful in releasing grief.
Final rites only:
This is not going to be for everyone as these are energetic death rites. Meaning, I use reiki to help a person experience a more peaceful transition. This is for people that are into energy healing or are spiritual but don’t practice a particular religion. I begin by setting sacred space and perform reiki on the person actively transitioning and on the loved ones in the room if desired. After the final breath, I will disengage whatever energy is left in the chakras. Then I will seal the chakras and this helps to release the aura.
No fee- I will do my best to be available (Georgina area, Aurora, Newmarket or Uxbridge)
Free half hour phone consultation
Hourly or packages are available
Reiki/reflexology is included for the client and the primary caregiver(s) in all death doula services
*** Please note: I do not offer mental health, medical or legal advice as I am a non-medically trained professional ***
Call or text: (905)758-0152
Facebook: Life & Death Doula Hayley
*** Please reach out and I will get back to you within 24 hrs. ***
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